Why I believe in Grief Coaching
Most people think of coaches for helping with personal issues, relationships, or business but not necessary for grief. But, I do for many reasons. Mainly, because coaching is designed to inspire, encourage and transform a client. A person who has suffered a loss and is grieving certainly needs to be encouraged and inspired to move forward. And eventually they will become transformed. One does not remain in the same state they existed in before their grief experience. Grief changes each and every one of us. I know this firsthand. I am not only writing about it, I have intimate experience with it after the suicide of my former husband in 2005.
Coaching does Help!
When someone grieves from a sudden and unexpected loss they often don’t know the best path to recovery. And that is usually the time they seek help. It can be a clergy member or a psychotherapist or a support group. I sought out all three. At the time of my loss I never thought of going to a grief coach. But I think differently as a trained one and can definitely see an equally positive role for people that need help.
It is important for the coach to determine if coaching is right for a client or not. Sometimes the client is in deep mental anguish or depression and they would need help from a psychotherapist. The coach has the skill of listening and therefore can determine if this is the case. There are situations where the client has worked with a therapist to resolve their depression and then they feel comfortable to work with a grief coach.
Grief coaching is different than psychotherapy because it’s not necessary to unravel the past. Grief is not something that arrived because of deep unresolved issues in one’s life. It occurred because the client has experienced the severing of a relationship and they feel a loss. Coaching can help them see that they have an identity apart from the deceased. It helps them become aware of the current state they are in and determine where they want to be in the future.
Grief Coaching is Unique.
Coaches can help the client find his or her new identity. They enable clients to discover their own internal powers that give them strength to understand what they really need. It empowers the client to take action steps to move forward without their deceased. Therefore their new identity emerges. Coaching also helps the client dig into the deepest resources they have to find answers. Plus it moves the client outside of the event of their loss that they believe has defined them.
I believe that a coach’s help is a gift to those who want to receive it. Mainly, because coaches listen. They are trained to know how to “really listen.” And most people don’t feel that they are ever “really heard.” During times of grief that is exactly what the person needs. A coach can help the client find purpose in life. It could be to help others or maybe it’s to be a good parent, spouse or friend, to find a new job, to find a mate or to start a new hobby. It doesn’t matter what it is but it’s important to discover it and take action steps. Mine were to become a trained suicide support group facilitator by AFSP(American Foundation For Support Prevention). Become a certified coach, NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) practitioner and create a facebook page for those who have lost loved ones to suicide, www.facebook.com/suiciderecovery. I also wrote the book, (Be Gentle with me I’m Grieving.)
I can be your coach
As a coach, I believe those who come to me feel a connection because I have had a similar experience as they have. This is very powerful and allows trust and respect between the two of us. Who can understand better than someone who has gone through the same experience? Therefore I believe grief coaching is extremely beneficial for someone who is grieving. And overall it can bring a client to find joy and purpose in their life after loss.
If you would like to start your journey of transformation, contact me through my website. www.robinchodak.com